The Year Of You

How do you start the new year? What are the goals that you set for the new year? For some people the new year is about healthy living, losing weight, eating healthy and just investing in their body image. Saving money is another top resolution on most people’s list along with planning and taking more trips. But do you actually sit down at the beginning of the year and plan out your goals? I think if nothing else the last 2 years have taught us that we have to live in the moment. You have to think about how you’re going to be able to survive in the future yes, but you must live in the moment because you can’t take each day for granted.

We’re living in the middle of a pandemic and people are dying at high rates daily.  So you have to be concerned with how much savings you have and how you’re taking care of your mind, body, and soul. But also you should take a deeper look into your day to day life. Like are the people around you people that should remain in your life. Do they impact your day negatively or positively? And yes, if you are unhappy in your current employment, this may be the year to quit. Just get it over with, because that job could be holding you back from a better future. And trust me, no matter how much your job talks about “we are family”; you will be replaced in the blink of an eye. They offer no incentives, no pay increase so you can feed your real family, and definitely trash talk you behind your back. And if you get sick and die that position number will be posted the next day. You’re only a pawn in their money making system. If you don’t want to be there, search for another job, step out on faith and start that business you have always wanted to start, but this is the year to be happily employed.

My suggestion for this year is not to think about your life and set 5, 10, or 15 year goals. But start with 1 goal. This makes it a bit easier to check things off your list while still living in the moment. This year should be all about getting back to you and making yourself a priority again. Taking some of the burden off yourself and not trying to live everyone else’s lives for them. It’s good to give a helping hand but you have to remember if you’re not healthy then you can’t help others.

Things to consider; start with the people you need to cut off. As simple as that. I know sometimes it’s hard to say we’re going to cut people off, but trust me if they value you the way you value them they will step up and pour into your relationship, and help it to grow healthily. If not, then love them from a far but let go. Most people don’t think about making a list of people to cut off, but sadly not everyone should be able to have access to you. Some people only come around when they need or when they’re going through it. But they don’t show up for you.

This year I’m going to be really mindful on who I give my energy to. I’m not chasing grown people to be in their lives and I’m not going to try to be the fixer and fix everyone’s life. My intention is to live in my own truth and feed my needs day to day, and that starts with lightening up my load and clearing people out.

 After you figure out who to cut off, focus on the people you may have overlooked in the past that deserved your attention. As your circle gets smaller, you’ll be able to give them more meaningful attention.  Learn something new about them, do new things together, have more in-depth conversations; but make it purposeful. Make real connections. No more surface level stuff.

The beginning of the year is also a good time to start your healing process. So you may want to figure out the people you need to forgive. Walking around with baggage is tiring and sometimes it’s best to forgive and move on. Forgive and accept or forgive and no longer mess with. Whatever you see fit, this is your journey. But let some shit go. Make peace with those who you can, it will do wonders for your mental and spiritual.

Just remember as you forgive others there may be someone that you have wronged along the way that you may need to ask for forgiveness from. Step up and own whatever hurt you placed on someone else and speak your truth. Be open to them and understand they don’t have to forgive you, but try and make an effort to clear up lingering issues. Sometimes it’s as simple as saying “I’m sorry”. For some people that will be enough. Taking ownership of the hurt you may have caused in the past.

This year, go out and make new friends, it’s ok. People keep talking about no new friends, but that’s just blocking possible connections. Possible blessings. It’s ok to make new connections and invite genuine people into your space. Like minded people also in search of genuine friendships.

Be more aware and take care of your mental health. Learn your triggers. Mediate, relax, and find a way to reduce stress or become stress free. Pamper yourself. And just find your happy.

Finally, think about how you can be a better human. This world is beating people down daily. How can you be a ray of sunshine? What are area’s in your life that you need to work on? Do you need to think more before you speak ? Do you need to soften your tone to get your point across? Do you need to speak up for yourself more? Whatever it is, do it! Try and be a better person each day that you are here. Give people a reason to miss and mourn you when you’re gone. Make your life count that even in death people have nothing but positive things to say about you, and how you impacted their lives and made them feel.

So this year cut people off, make new connections, quit your wack ass job if you don’t like it. Work out your mind, body, and soul. Take care of your mental health. Save money, take trips, fix your credit, be a good human. But most importantly, put yourself first, be happy, have fun, and live in the moment.